Saturday, August 7, 2010

the mysteries of ladyships

I am here in New York City and learning all sorts of things that fill my head inside and outside and wherever else there are sides.  And I hadn't hitherto had access to a television.  And hitherto I hadn't had access to Netflix with sound I could hear properly.  But hitherto is over.  And so I have been watching Veronica Mars.
Since apparently I'll only watch cancelled television shows on computers and computer-type dealies.  This is a mystery.  An unsolved mystery of me.  However, this is not and hardly is the point.  The point is - is - lady detectives are neat.  Some things about this Veronica Mars show are dumb as stumps, but the detective part is totally neat.
I love the gentlemen detectives, don't get me wrong.  But the lady ones are pretty dandy.  Here are some weird and wonderful gentlelady detectives.

Jessica Fletcher
To be honest, I've never watched Murder, She Wrote but I know I'd enjoy it.  It includes Angela Lansbury and that's enough for me.  I love old ladies and I love mysteries, so what better combination than the two?  And she's a writer and I'm a writer!  See me now and how I write these words??  However, I don't have much to say on the subject of Murder, She Wrote since my knowledge on the matter is shallow at best.  But on the matter of Angela I saw her on Broadway and she is the most wonderful little old lady performer.  If I could have half the razzamatazz she has at her age, I'll be the happiest camper at Senior Citizens' Day Camp.

Angela and Bea Arthur were best buddies!
I hope when I am aged and wise I can wear as fine a turquoise bow tie as Bea.  As for now, I will pretend I ride this turquoise bicycle.  
As, apparently, on her show Angela didn't drive and always rode a bike or took cabs or something.  Plus, people are far less suspicious of people on bicycles.  If you're looking to be a discreet detective.  Or just save gas money.  

OOH.  There's a Murder, She Wrote cookbook.  Tippi Hedren has a recipe in there.  If there's one thing I love just as much as mysteries, Angela Lansbury and Bea, it's a cookbook.  Check it out.

Nancy Drew
I used to read a lot of Nancy Drew.  She was a cool lady.  I'm pretty sure she didn't have a dumb old job - she was too busy with the job of life!  And she had a boyfriend referred to as her "special friend" -  like in movies I've seen how a divorced parent might refer to their companion when talking to their children!  She had it all!  She didn't take money for solving mysteries and was crafty and wily and all that kind of thing.
These mysteries of secrets and leaning chimneys don't just solve themselves, you know.  And this detective also has a cookbook!  See here and now!

I guess since Nancy and Angela both have cookbooks based off their mystery solving roots, we can gather that if a lady can solve a mystery, she cook a mean casserole.  Or whatever it is people used to cook back in their day.  So I suppose if I can cook a casserole, I can solve a mean mystery.  I'm going to make a casserole to see if I should become a private and public detective.  Maybe this Lion's Head Casserole.
Don't worry.  There're no lion heads in it - not even a one!  But there's plenty of pork butt!!  For everyone!

Speaking of food, I'm in the middle of My Life in France by Julia Child, sort of, since it was really put together by some other guy.  But from her letters and memories and it is a DELIGHT!  Julia would have made a brilliant detective, since she was such a wonderful cook.  If she had a show or a book series they could call it Child Detective.  And people think it would be about children!  But it wouldn't!  It wouldn't at all!!

Although in this photo Julia seems more suited to being a merry murderess.
And she does have the temperament of blood-thirst.  I think she's eaten, beaten and cooked most animals under the sun, sea and ground.  My kind of lady!!
BUT.  If Julia Child ever had gone on a crime spree we'd need another cook on the case.  I know just the woman for the job - it's PAULA!!
But first she'd need to solve The Case of the Missing Butter.

Oh, Paula.  Such a scamp.  I never know what you're doing.  And I LOVES IT!

more detectives to follow shortly...

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