Friday, October 15, 2010

jobs 'n' crafts!

Today I had a job interview, where in which we were asked to craft something within 10 minutes and I made this.
Is it the most beautiful thing in the world?  No!  Is it the most complicated?  NO!  But was it the best one at the GROUP interview?  Yes.  Yes, it was.  This leads me to my topic of discussion today - interviews.  I firmly believe group interviews are the worst invention known to man.  Unless I am a cow at a country dance or a clam in a jar, I don't want to do anything in a group.  Any interviews, I mean.  

The questions are already so silly and then you have to sit there and smile while 4 other dopes answer some stupid question that a monkey could answer with its mouth taped shut and it's tail tied to its stomach.  And if it's an especially basic question you have to hear the same thing 4 times and then when it's your turn you have to try and make something up to make yourself stand out so you don't look like just another smelly dog in a basket.
And it's inappropriate to laugh at what someone else decides is a good answer and especially inappropriate if they decide to improv an entire situation and play multiple roles to make their point.  And you have to politely snortle when they make some hosebeast type joke about how they're just too chipper.  You can't just roll your eyes or fart in their general direction.  
And in my case you have to then think about what you're wearing in comparison to some old lady who decided to wear a blazer and a business skirt with big old heels.  This isn't the 1800s.  We don't have to wear our hair in a floating cloud orb about our skulls.  But perhaps do I look too casual in my usual work interview attire?  
I usually choose to wear a tasteful paperbag dress or to wear overalls and hold an enormous cookie.

Anyway.  
This interview was fun on account of getting to use a glue stick and glitter and stamps and paper.  I decide here and now that all jobs should require you to make something.  I think it would be especially fun if you forced applicants into a room full of instruments and asked them to make a song.  Or maybe stick them in a room with cardboard boxes and ask them to make a city.  Or a robot.  OR A ROCKET.  Or stick them in a kitchen and make cookies.  Make anything really.  You should probably do that when trying out prospective friends.

Or at least get them to eat a bucket of paste.

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