Thursday, January 2, 2014

Gumdrop Lane 2: The Bloggening

It's been almost a year since my last entry so the time has come to revive Gumdrop Lane. And this incarnation shall be known as THE BLOGGENING! So let's get started, shall we?

It's a new year and that means a new me! Or at least an old me who has new clothes from Christmas and an awesome meat grinder I'm going to use to make AMAZING sausages and meat pies! I'm going to be just like Angela Lansbury as Mrs. Lovett in Sweeney Todd.
Not just Mrs. Lovett. But Angela Lansbury as her. You know what? I'm just gonna be Angela Lansbury this year. DONE.

Another momentous thing about the close of 2013? It also brought the renewal of one of television's most beloved characters: Ja'mie King.


It seems only fitting to kick of the new year with the mention of Ja'mie since the last blog entry almost a year ago pertained to that very same Private School Girl.

I think Ja'mie can be a great role model in a lot of ways. Sure, she has some truly terrible qualities, but we can still learn a lot from horrible people:

Dance like everyone is watching and thinks you're amazing.
Ja'mie is self-assured and emotive. You can feel the story she's telling. You should always let yourself shine in a spotlight of your own making. Express yourself with body and soul.

Don't let guys poop all over your lady friendships.

What you see in the above video is Ja'mie and Madison letting a guy poop all over their lady friendship. Don't do this. Ja'mie learns the error of her ways and makes up with Madison. And she still gets the guy. So when you don't let guys get in the way, your lady friends and you can soar!

Be confident because you're hot.
Ja'mie is a grade A hottie and she knows it. She tells everybody. So have faith in your own hotness. Be bold with your hotness. Because what else can you be when you're superhot?

Give people advice because they need it.

Sure, she's harsh and horrifically racist and homophobic, but sometimes people need to hear the truth. You know, maybe if she didn't tell that chick her makeup looked really cool and that it hid her skin problems she would never know! She might revert back to unflattering makeup that exacerbated her skin issues because nobody told her it looked cool the way Ja'mie did. And maybe Jess would get a boyfriend if she had better hair. Jess, your hair sucks.

Coin your own lingo.

Because if there's not a word for how you are and there should be, make one up.

So if I can be a little more like Ja'mie this year, I don't think that would be such a bad thing.

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